Dig That Uranium

Genre: Comedy
Released: 1956
Directed by: Edward Bernds
Starring: Leo Gorcey, Huntz Hall, Bernard Gorcey, Mary Beth Hughes
Alfalfa portrays: "Shifty" Robinson, a fast-talking shyster who dupes the boys into a uranium mine scheme.
Alfalfa's screen time: 3:32
Lines of dialogue spoken by Alfalfa: 30

As "Dig That Uranium" opens, Slip and a couple of his boys are sitting in Louie's luncheonette. Louie brings them their "lunch", which consists of three glasses of water. Just then, Satch strides into the luncheonette and calls out "Hey fellas, look who I found!" In bounds Alfalfa as "Shifty" Robinson. He has a sharp-looking dark suit and tie, topped off by a cowboy hat. Over his shoulder is slung an apparatus that we soon find out is a geiger counter (ostensibly, anyway.)

Slip: Shifty Robinson!... fellas, get a load of the 15-gallon chateau [referring to Alfalfa's hat].
Satch: He just flew in from Nevada. And if you've never seen a millionaire before— you're lookin' at one now!
Slip: Ah, you must be gaggifying me— the last time I saw Shifty, he was working in the street! He was a pitch man, he was sellin' those automatic toys...
Alfalfa [grinning broadly]: Ah, that's before I heard about the uranium boom... feast your eyes on this [he pulls out a wad of bills from his pocket].
Louie: Look at that bunch of cabbage! Let me see it a little bit... how much money ya' got in there?
Alfalfa: Oh, I haven't counted it lately. This is just what I carry around for pen [?] money. Yeah, fellas... as soon as I sell my claim, I'm off to spend my declining years in luxury. Havana... Rio... Gay Paree...

Slip then turns skeptical and asks exactly how the uranium is found.

Alfalfa: There's nothin' to it, Slip. All you need is a geiger counter like this. Why, it'll show you the payoff rock like a pedigree bird dog puttin' his finger on a mallard duck. Here's a sample of uranium ore...
Satch: Or what?
Alfalfa [slightly annoyed]: Ore, ore, like in a rock, it's uranium ore, [to Louie] put this earphone on... now tell me what you hear [machine makes crackling noise].
Louie: I hear clickety-clock... sure there's no short circuit here?
Alfalfa: No, no, Louie. No! The needle confirms what you hear in the earphones. And every click means money... and fellas, she clicks five times faster than the meter on a taxicab.

Slip tells his pals that he knows all about how the machine works— "on nuclear fission, only you're fission for uranium."

Alfalfa: Right! Couldn't have phrased it better myself!
Slip: ...I just happen to have a little inconsequential knowledge of electronics. Now did you tell me that that rock came from your claim? [referring to a sample of uranium ore Alfalfa has been brandishing.]
Alfalfa: Absolutely!
Slip: And there's more supplications like it up there?
Alfalfa: [mock incredulity]: More?! Well, my mine "The Little Daisy" is chock full of uranium ore, like blintzes with cheese!
Louie: Then why do you wanna sell it?
Alfalfa: Why?... Why?!... Fellas— you hurt me: Here... [puts his hand to his heart].

Slip apologizes for their skepticism and asks Alfalfa how much they would have to pay for a piece of the action.

Alfalfa: Well... for a friend... in the neighborhood of a grand. [Slip counters with an offer of $500] Ha ha ha... you're a shrewd trader, Slip, but I'm in a hurry to get to Paris, so I'll take it.

Upon hearing this, Slip convinces Louie to find some money, stashed behind the counter in various hidden locations: in a toaster, in a malted milk tumbler, etc. When all the money is collected, Louie hands it off to Alfalfa, who rifles the edges of the bills next to his ear as if he is "counting" it.

Alfalfa: Five hundred dollars exactly! [Alfalfa then begins to act like he's in a hurry to leave and hands the boys all his uranium paraphernalia] Thank you! And here's your deed, and here's the necessary equipment. And fellas, as we say in the west: adios!!

Alfalfa twirls his cowboy hat in the air as a farewell salute and hurriedly hightails it out of the luncheonette.


Alfalfa makes a hasty exit.

Alfalfa turns in a crisp performance in "Dig That Uranium". It is one of his more appealing grownup roles, although, clocking in at three and a half minutes, is typical of his smaller appearances during the fifties. Alfalfa's appearance in a Bowery Boys film completes a circle, of sorts: The three Gas House Kids films, which Alfalfa appeared in during the mid-forties, were a take-off on the more successful "Dead End Kids" series which was just entering prominence ("East Side Comedies" was yet another name by which the Bowery Boys series was known.)

Benny Bartlett, who co-starred in "Dig That Uranium", also appeared in the Gas House films with Alfalfa a decade previous. And Stanley Clements, who appeared with Alfalfa in "Going My Way" and "Underworld Scandal", was chosen to be the nominal replacement for Leo Gorcey when Gorcey left the series in 1956, shortly after "Dig That Uranium" was released.


Publicity poster for "Dig That Uranium"


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